A Question of Comparison


I once sent a friend a text with a message that went something like this:

I wish you could see yourself the way that I see you. 

She was having a really bad day and was frustrated with her dating life, or something that may have felt trivial to me, but was breaking her. I, equally as frustrated with the fact that she couldn’t see what she had to offer, sent her that little reminder.

Fast forward to last Saturday night. Having given into hormones, succumbed to the effects of what a detox of sugar can do to you, and in the midst of a rather stressful time in my life, I broke down.

I hate admitting that I am not strong all the time. I truly wish the Super Woman keychain I have was identification. But alas it is not and since I had done everything on my list to get myself back to normal and I wasn’t succeeding, I called a friend.

Because sometimes we need a reminder of who we are and only someone else can tell you that.

You see, caught up in circumstance, it’s easy to look at the now and believe that we have somehow failed, that we are somehow not enough. We validate our worth by our current circumstance instead of by who created us.

This is something, I have personally lived with all my life. Call it what you will, diagnose me what you want, how I am made, can often influence the degree to which and the speed by which I forget my value and spiral into what I like to call “my little alternative universe”.

And sadly, as we live in an age where more information is available. Where we can easily find evidence of others doing better in life than us and, I believe most unfortunately, while we are a very blessed generation in many ways, we are also finding it more difficult to find stability. Therefore, with all these pieces together, the comparison, the frustrations, the would haves and should haves and why aren’t I there yet, can easily become too much.

 We do not have the audacity to put ourselves in the same class or compare ourselves with some who [supply testimonials to] commend themselves. When they measure themselves by themselves and compare themselves with themselves, they lack wisdom and behave like fools. 2 Cor 10:12 (AMP)

I know I can’t be the only one. I know I am not. Obviously people living in biblical times had issues with comparison!

And the funny thing is, comparison isn’t always so obvious. It’s not as if I sit and look at Instagram and go “oh my gosh, I can’t believe I am not there yet”. ok. I do sometimes. But I notice it and then tell myself I am stupid.

So instead of comparing ourselves to what we see on social media or hear at the lunch table. We need to start looking at our own lives and what we have accomplished. We need to look at our now and compare it to our before and realise the beautiful journey God has each of us on, the great achievements he has given me talents for, the path I have walked, the race I have run.

Look at the hurdles you have jumped over. The shyness you overcame. The fitness goals you have achieved. The differences you made in someone else’s life. The impact you have already had on this earth.

Somedays we need a reminder of where we have been and a smack in the head (with a chair) of how far we have come and what we have accomplished.

Give yourself a little credit.

See yourself like others see you.

And then keep moving forward.


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